2 de 7

Hoy van dos de siete. Hace dos años que estamos juntos. Hace dos años que decidimos darnos una oportunidad. 

Hemos peleado, como cualquier otra pareja. Hemos disfrutado, mucho, más que cualquier otra cosa. Tenemos gustos diferentes, pero coincidimos en lo esencial. 

Has estado ahí, a mi lado, en las gordas y en las muy flacas. Me tienes mucha paciencia, mucha y eso lo agradezco y procuro no abusar.

Tengo un plan, un plan contigo, un plan al que me invitaste y del que quiero ser parte. Me has dado el más grande de los abrazos: desde lo estrictamente amoroso, hasta la "bienvenida" a Belgica y a la cultura de este país. Estás dispuesto a pasar por encima de las diferencias culturales y a amarme a pesar de ellas. Aunque a veces pierdo la paciencia y "no soy yo", aún en esos momentos, soy capaz de ver todas las cosas buenas que tenemos juntos y lo afortunada que soy por ello.

Que sean muchas más años. Que podamos hacernos viejitos juntos.

7

I have been so distracted or relaxed or lazy or something. Last week I realised it has been over 7 years by now. Time just won't stop.

I remember clearly how, in my mind, this country was a two years plan. I remember going to Mexico and thinking that Brussels was just a provisional thing. I remember seeing myself living somewhere else. I remember having troubles calling the studio "home".

Now, after more than 2555 days / 84 months, things in my mind have changed quite a bit. I feel comfortable here. I don't care about the bad weather. I find peace and I have a home and a family.

Who would have say, right?

Are you with me

Many years passed by. Many stories. Many nights and many suns. I'm finally getting back my country and my city. I'm back to who I am and I own my days in Mexico. I'm free from memories and I've stopped missing the past.

And this time, some people got to see the place where I'm coming from and how even when messy, it's a great place. My Mexico, all mine.

Rompecabezas

And I was inserted in a puzzle. I have been trying to fit, but the picture won't change. It's only me the one that needs to fit. Makes me feel caught and like I don't really belong. After all these months sometimes I just feel like quitting. I feel like I always have to give up and the more I do, the more I stop being myself.

Fait au Mexique

It's difficult to think about myself as other thing than a Mexican. People might have another impression, but I don't see myself replacing all that I was born and raised with by other symbols or culture. I think I have a bit of an identity issue at the moment...

In the other hand I feel very proud of having achieved this by myself, and for all this time away from Mexico being brave and figuring out stuff all on my own. I'm hoping to be brave for many other challenges even though I feel a bit overwhelmed right now.

Identity

And with a letter to renew the ID card after all these years is that suddenly I feel overwhelmed and stressed about not speaking fluently one of the three official languages in Belgium. 

And the waist and the neglecting period that ended a few weeks ago.

And our little family going to live to a different place and me feeling like I won't be as independent as I'm for the moment . 

And dad and the brothers and the never ending Mexican soap opera of everything falling down while me living the "good" life in Europe.

The persons that we are

With our own skin, dragging all our dramas, all the stuff that we learned as kids and beyond. All our fears, all the things that can make us happy. All the stuff that will give us nightmares. All the things that make us uncomfortable or afraid. Who we are and our complexity.That is what we intend the loved one to understand and love. Not an easy task, not an easy one...